Cravings

Following the best advice of a good health coach ( moi ), I spent the week boosting my water intake and tracking my cravings.  The cravings inventory hasn't been much of a surprise.  I could have told you without the aid of pencil scratchings in a spiral bound memo book I get an energy lag around 2:30 or 3:00 in the afternoon that sets the cap of my desire on a warm steamy cup of something caffeinated and frothy, preferably with a moist and sugary baked good for accompaniment.  I'm not alone in this type of craving: it's something the Starbucks corporation has made a name and tidy fortune for itself in recognizing and serving.  Couldn't their stock be reasonably classified as an Energy Industry equity?

Something about writing it down validates it, though.  Yes, I want a big jolt of sugar right now because I'm tired and sad and it'll make me feel better.  When you're aware, so the story goes, you can make better decisions.  Well, I'm here to tell you, you can still make worse decisions too.  The difference is, the inventory makes you attentive to those decisions.  You own them consciously.  This weekend, with the luxury of not being trapped in my cubicle, I actually let myself fall asleep when my energy lagged mid-afternoon.  Guess what?  When I awakened, the craving was gone.  Another time (or, let's be honest, three) I let myself have the sugar.  And guess what else?  I felt better.  There, I said it, health coach and all.  Yes, I felt instantly better after scarfing some cookies or milk chocolate.

Then I felt worse.  A lot worse.  Partly because the sugar did what you hear it does -- crashed and left me more drained and more hungry.  But mostly I felt exhausted because I let myself down.  The whole point of this exercise is to make informed and improved decisions; to do and feel better based on those decisions.

Doing better isn't just about making better food choices, though.  Doing better is also about not being so hard on yourself, not demanding perfection.  It's about being able to forgive yourself and letting you like yourself maybe just a little bit more -- at least enough to treat yourself like you'd treat a friend whose company you enjoy.  Would you stuff saturated fat and white sugar down her throat if she'd asked you to help her reduce them?  Of course you wouldn't!  Treat yourself, at a minimum, with the same regard you'd have for someone who's not even a blood relative.

Down half a pound.